It's an admittedly facetious title this week, which in part relates to the Cannes nominated film that takes the top slot this week, but it also indicates that there's not much really jumping out to me. If you slept through the weekend would you honestly miss anything worth seeing? Personally I very much doubt it, there may be some OK releases out of 14 new movies (the highest number we've had out in a particular week) including 2 US chart toppers but I doubt anything's going to end up on anyone's top ten lists. Film of the week is Sleeping Beauty.
Sleeping Beauty
This film divided audiences in Cannes where critics fought over whether the central character played by Emily Browning is empowered or subjugated by her job as an unconscious prostitute, and you can be sure Julia Leigh's debut gets the same response in it's UK release.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●●○○○○○
Dolphin Tale
I don't think anyone had this true-life inspirational fable of a dolphin that loses it's tail and the boy who fights for a prosthetic replacement on their radar at the beginning of the year, sure it may have Morgan Freeman tottering on the edge of the storyline, but no-one expected it to take the $50m it's just passed at the US box office. So it must have something heart-warming in it.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●○○○○○○
Footloose
Remake of the classic 80's dance drama with Kenny Wormald taking the Kevin Bacon part and bringing rock and roll to the small town where dancing has been banned and bringing the kids to their rebellious feet. I may go and see this...
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●○○○○○○
Three Musketeers
Each generation gets the Dumas adaptation it deserves, so whilst I grew up with the comic swash-buckler starring Michael York, now we have Paul W.S. Anderson's steampunk visualisation with Logan Lerman (who at least I've never heard of), Christoph Waltz provides bad guy swagger and Milla Jovovich is badass in a corset.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●○○○○○○
Aazaan
Bollywood movie that explores the boundaries between loyalty to family and to Mother India, as the titular half-Afghan hero must prevent the terrorist plot led by his brother.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
Albatross
Low budget British indie with an interesting cast, led by Julia Ormond and Felicity Jones, that explores an unconventional love triangle with one of two friends falling for the others father.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
Everything must Go
I'm not completely sure why this Will Ferrell vehicle has completely passed me by until it's UK opening. It could be because it's his reach for dramatic credibility as his relapsing alcoholic loses his family and decides to sell all his stuff in order to move on. Rebecca Hall and Laura Dern support.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
Khushiyaan
The Bollywood movie industry is at least in part built on the dramatic tension between family and career, and here the theme is built upon with an architect and his New York based wife and child returning to the Punjab village where he grew up and reuniting with his ailing father.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
Real Steel
Rocky with Robots? It swept to the top of the US charts last weekend, and should almost certainly do the same on this side of the pond, with it's ubiquitous bus advertising campaign, but I've yet to hear anything about the movie that makes it seem unmissable. Although Hugh Jackman doing Sugar Ray Leonard's fight choreography might be worth it.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
Retreat
It's another entry in the mankind falls apart after a virus begins to wipe people out sub-genre, joining last week's Perfect Sense and the upcoming Contagion, only this time we have sweaty trio of Brit thesps Thandie Newton, Jamie Bell and Cillian Murphy fighting in a small island retreat.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
Texas Killing Fields
I'm not sure why but earlier in the year this swampland cop drama was picking up awards buzz, possibly because it's the sophomore directorial effort of Michael Mann's daughter Ami Canaan or the appearance of the ubiquitous Jessica Chastain with Sam Worthington among those chasing the local serial killer with a taste for small girls.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
First Night
Odd little mix of Country house romantic shenanigans and opera as a bunch of industrialists with more time than sense decide to put on an amateur performance of Mozart's Cosi Fan Tutti. The music is, of course, fantastic, but the soap level histrionics look utterly missable.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
Snehaveedu
Finally Mayamalan Comic drama also sees a wandering character returning home to his small village, this time the prodigal is the father who must get to know the son he left behind.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
Friday, 14 October 2011
Time for a quick nap (Out this week - 14/10/11)
Friday, 24 December 2010
Booking my ticket to my own circle of hell (Out this week - 24/12/10)
Do you want the good news or the bad news? Well, the good news is that's it's Christmas weekend. We all have the opportunity to spend time in the loving arms of our families, feasting on festive treats and spreading the joy of the season. The bad news: cinemas are virtually no go areas. This is officially the worst week I can remember, certainly the worst since I've been writing up the releases. The even more horrifying news is that I have to choose a film of the week - I can't just advise to stay at home or go sledging - so under duress I have to pick the plain awful looking Little Fockers. I'm so very sorry.
I also missed a few films over the past few weeks so there is a mini catch-up as well.
Arthur and the Great Adventure
Belated sequel of the French produced digi-animation. Now with more R'n'B stars in the cast, including Will-I-Am and Snoop Dogg - you have to wonder what their agents were thinking - and the revenge of the villainous Maltazard.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
Chatroom
I'm not sure why but Hideo Nakata, director of Ringu, has filmed his latest horror flick in London and has almost certainly lost all of his faculties. A Breakfast Club like selection of teens join an online social network site only to find it's run by a homicidal maniac.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
Little Fockers
I feel so very bad having this as number one, although I suspect it will top the box office charts so at least I won't be actually paying for it. The uncomedy Father/son-in-law duo Robert De Niro and Ben Stiller reunite for another "wacky" set of adventures probably involving child excrement's. Amazingly the supporting cast includes Dustin Hoffman and Barbra Streisand (both returning) as well as newbies Harvey Keitel and Laura Dern.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●○○○○○○
Tees Mar Khan
The first of Two Bollywood entries for this week (and I honestly think if these films were shown to critics there would have been an even chance of one of them being film of the week) is a Akshay Kumar starring action comedy. They were playing the songs on a loop at the Spice of India last week and I was getting into it.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
Toonpur Ka Superhero
This one truly does look dreadful. A family find themselves into a subterranean world entirely populated by badly drawn cartoons in this family adventure. Looks like a less interesting and less funny Roger Rabbit.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
And on to the missing films (please note I have been checking back to the beginning of the year in order to ensure my records are correct).
From 17 December 2010
Manmadhan Ambu
Very little information around about this Tamil film, comments on the youtube trailer page oddly concentrate on the atheistic sentiments expressed by one of it's stars, Kamal Hassan, during a recent interview.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
From 10 December 2010
A Serbian Film
Repulsive looking gorno masquerading as allegory about the history of Serbia. A retired porn star gets tricked into working for a sadistic director hellbent on making a snuff film to end all snuff films. Extreme sequences of sexual violence, and not for the faint-hearted.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
From 03 December 2010
Chikku Bikku
I had the strangest feeling that I'd seen the trailer for this part UK set Bollywood movie before. I still didn't like it.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
Mar Jawan Gur Khake
I think it's a romantic comedy - seriously if anyone reads this blog and has any sway with Boolywood films tell them to - at the very least - submit a synopsis to Pearl and Dean. Thank you.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
Simran
Not even a trailer this time. but I don know that ones of the songs is Ve Kude Patole Bargi, that it's filmed in Punjabi and that Gunghu Gill, Simran Randhawa and Sheetal Bedi star.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
From 03 December 2010
Leap Year
Not to be confused with the dreadful Amy Adams comedy earlier in the year this is a meditative study of a Mexican woman longing for connection to a man and her masochistic carnal desires that result.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
Sleeping Princess
It's a Turkish film, so don't expect subtlety but there is some interesting looking stuff in the trailer for this modern day fairy tale based around an eternal optimist looking for a better life.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
From 18 June 2010
Journey to Mecca
Really no excuses for missing this, to be honest I thought it was a documentary (and there are some filmed passages during the Hajj, the fifth pillar of Islam) but for the most part this is a biopic of the student and explorer Ibn Battuta who travelled, in 1325, from Morocco to the Arabian peninsula to carry out this sacred act.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●○○○○○○
Tuesday, 10 February 2009
Laura Dern
Happy Birthday to
Laura Dern
42 today
Congratulations, Laura, on your Golden Globe win for Recount the other week, but please make some more films. Maybe with your good friend David Lynch?
