Well, I'm back. The tour has completed - for the time being (I'll try and get in a personal news later today to explain this) and I've got this opportunity to catch up with the last 3 weeks of cinematic releases. I do feel a pang of guilt about not previewing these films, although I doubt any of them needed me. The first 2 weeks were actually pretty exciting with closely fought battles for the film of the week, with Paranormal Activity taking it on 27 November and Departures leading the pack on 04 December. This week was much easier to predict with Where the Wild Things Are really standing out as one to watch.
11 December 2009
Carriers
Do you want to see a film about the fall of mankind against an unspecified threat? Do you find the wait until The Road and The Book of Eli unbearable? Do you find Star Trek's Chris Pine unbearably cute? If the answer to these questions is yes, then this is the film for you.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
Limits of Control
Jim Jarmusch directs a self-referential, obscure, inaccessible crime movie with a group of increasingly famous stars making unrecognisable cameos. It's like the quintessential Jarmusch picture. Not sure if it's me, though.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●●○○○○○
Mascarades
Algerian comedy. There aren't many of those, so scarcity will no doubt increase the anticipation for the film.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
Rocket Singh - Salesman of the Year
Modern Indian comedy about a young man working in a outsourced call centre. Well loved on the net, so I'm giving it an unusual (for Bollywood) 3 blobs.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
7 Husbands for Hurmuz
Turkish comedy about a serial bigamist in Istanbul. Nurgül Yesilcay (as the titular Hurmuz) is clearly having a ball in the trailer.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
The Stepfather
Woeful looking remake of classic 80's slasher flick, with all the scares and social commentary edited out. Amber Heard spends most of the movie in her panties, which could be sen as a bonus.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
Unmade Beds
Alexis Dos Santos's first English language pic is set in the squatting communities in London and spefically looks at the romance between two immigrants as they reach turnign points in their lives.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
Where the Wild Things Are
The critical reaction has been surprisingly mixed, Anthony Quinn of the Independent felt it was less competent than The Stepfather, and US receipts were not what was expected. I'm up for it though. Let the rumpus start.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●●●●○○○
04 December 2009
The Box
Richard Kelly continues to astound and confuse with his latest sci-fi thriller, based on the short story by Richard Matheson. Would you cause the death of someone you don't know for $1m? Even if the plot unravels in the final third it's definitely a film to watch.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●●○○○○○
Cracks
Jordan (daughter of Ridley) Scott makes her directorial debut with this British boarding school set drama. Essentially about the power and influence of teachers and the popular girls in school.
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Departures
Surprise winner of the 2008 best Foreign language Oscar, this Japanese drama about a former cellist taking a job as a formal undertaker and discovering the dignity in death and the importance of leading life to the full.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●●○○○○○
The Descent: Part 2
Needless sequel, replacing the tight knit group of friends with their individual character traits and collective baggae with ctock characters and excessive gore. Avoidable.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
Disgrace
Adaptation of well regarding J. M Coetzee novel with John Malkovich playing a South African lecturer coming to terms about the truth of racial relations in Africa and his own prejudices.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●●○○○○○
The Girlfriend Experience
Experimental Soderbergh picture about a high class hooker, and her personal trainer boyfriend. It's the fourth film for him this year, I'm up for it but with the low fi approach I can see why some will be turned off.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●○○○○○○
I Know You Know
Autobiographical film about a boy grwoing up in a small Welsh town and slowly discovering his father is a MI5 agent. I have no idea who this Robert Carlyle starrer is aimed at.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
Me and Orson Welles
Zac Efron continues to find ways to take over the world by choosing a key acting project working for renowned indie filmmaker Richard Linklater and co-starring with heavily buzzed Chritian McKay playing Orson Welles. Bombastic and exuberant.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●●○○○○○
Merry Gentleman
Michael Keaton returns from wherever he's been hiding with this directorial debut set in a depressed small town with an stand out performance from Kelly Macdonald.
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Paa
Sort of a Bollywood version of Jack. Only less smaltzy looking and probably more incisive.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
Planet 51
When we look back at the story of animation in 2009 I imagine this Dwayne Johnson/Justin Long vehicle about a US astronaut landing on an inhabited planet will be quickly forgotten. That might be a shame as the trailer looks fun, with some geeky references and perhaps a satrical title.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
Radio - Love on Air
I know absolutely nothing about this film at all. Just the title. Not much I know, but given it's a limited Bollywood release I'm not even going to make the effort to find out any more.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
Situations Vacant
Irish comedy about how you can use white lies to really boost your circumstances, but then once they start to unravel can lead to hilarious consequences. No I'm not buying that intro either.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
27 November 2009
Bunny and the Bull
DIY film making at it's best as a group of friends go on a pan-European road trip, without leaving the comfort of their shared flat. From the makers of The Mighty Boosh.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●○○○○○○
De Dana Dan
Akshay Kumar is one of the most prolific and famous stars in modern Bollywood, this is his latest project. His name is really all that's needed to see it to the masses so I haven't looked up anythign else.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
Law Abiding Citizen
Gerard Butler is a Law Abiding Citizen who following the horrific murder of his wife and daughter and the subsequent double dealings by Jamie Foxx's sleazy D.A. decides to kill everyone. Sub Death Wish tosh.
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Mr. Right
Gay Rom com, set in London's Soho as the characters search for thier own Mr. Right. If it's anything like the Soho I know it will involves lots of bad cocktails and many catty comments about other people in the club. Although the trailer makes it seem like it could be anywhere.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
Naan Avan Illai 2
If you liked Naan Avan Illai then this is the film for you...
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Nativity!
Quaint looking british comedy about intense competition in neighbouring primary schools for their Nativity plays. Looks charming and fun. If you've got a family this could be one for you.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
Paranormal Activity
Masively successful indie horror film, showing that audiences care more for carefully constructed relationships and believeable set up than cheap thrills and gore. And it proves that a door moving fractionally is the scariest thing in the world.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●○○○○○○
Seraphine
French biopic about the illeterate cleaner who became one of the early 2oth Centuries most influence female artists.
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20 November 2009
And a couple of films that I had missed from the previous week - both of which have almost certainly disappeared from cinemas by now.
Christmas in Wonderland
Shameless release of one of Patrick Swayze's last films, which on reflection should have stayed locked up in a vault in LA. Single father Swayze takes his kids on a shopping trip ahead of the Christmas holidays. Family fun happens.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
Valley of the Wolves: Gladio
Latest installment in long running successful Turkish action franchise.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
The Oscar Shortlists for the 97th Academy Awards
14 hours ago
3 comments:
Where the Wild Things Are... I'll either completely ignore it or have an Orgasmic feeling while watching it. I just hope in a strange way that a screener doesn't fall on my lap before I get to see it on the big screen once I get back to Bucharest...
I already swore that I'm not seeing Nine or The Lovely Bones until January 29th when they premier in Bucharest. The Lovely Bones especially - as it seems to be THE cinematic experience. [unlike the blue flying cats]
What a list! Many of these have either not made it to Chicago, or flew under the radar in record time...I lament the current state of film distribution!
The only one of interest to me would seem to be Me and Orson Welles. I'd like to hear more from you on this one.
Nice work!
~Tom
Alex - I'm expecting WTWTA to be orgasmic, although I've never read the book so I don't know what that lack of prior knowledge will do to the experience.
I'm not sure I could cope with any of the "big" cinematic experiences on a screener. To really judge a film you've got to see it in the way it was intended. Although I'm looking forward to the blue cats more than the magical heaven.
Tom - It's been a crazy few weeks for releases, with the 13 films released on 04 December being a record for the year, although the overall quality hasn't been as exciting. Most of these films are only limited releases, maybe in the West End so I don't get a chance to see all of them. However I do understand the thinking behind that. While US audiences are paying $650 on Transformers for every $1 spent on my top film of the year then cinemas will want to fill screens accordingly.
I haven't had the opportunity to catch Me & Orson Welles yet, but I did here an interesting anecdote about Christian McKay from one of the guys on the tour who studied with him... But I shouldn't be repeating it here.
If I do get a chance to see it I'll write up a mini-review.
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