I thought about backdating this post by a couple of years so it looks like I was reading the future - but that would be a silly thing to do as no-one would read it (even less than the normal count of people who read the release round-up). Some interesting looking projects out this week, with Richard Ayoade's debut probably picking up the highest praise, but it's Woody who gets my - doubtless unwarranted - support with film of the week going to You will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger.
You will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger
Woody Allen returns to London for the fourth time with his latest relationship comedy, this time with a heavy dose of fortune telling providing the narrative force. He's persuaded high profile thesps like Anthony Hopkins, Naomi Watts and Josh Brolin to come along for the ride.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●●●●●○○
Lincoln Lawyer
Matthew McConaughey in non-romantic comedy shocker! He plays the titular attorney, conducting business out of the back of his car including defending the highly-dodgy looking playboy Ryan Phillippe. I'm guessing all is not as it seems. Marisa Tomei and William H. Macy pop up to provide sound advice.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●●○○○○○
Ballast
New Orleans based drama which follows the brother, wife and son of a suicide victim as they struggle to make sense of his actions and begin to piece their lives back together. Very highly praised on the festival circuit.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●○○○○○○
Route Irish
Ken Loach turns his critical eye towards the invasion of Iraq and the private security firms that appear to run unchecked amongst the criminal underworld of the Middle East. There are actual scenes of waterboarding in the film which the actor involved is suing for compensation right now.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●○○○○○○
Submarine
Richard Ayoade, Moss from the excellent "IT Crowd", makes his feature directorial debut with this Welsh coming of age story. Based on Joe Dunthorne's novel it focuses on the dilemmas faced by Oliver Tate (Craig Roberts) and his precocious thoughts about starring in the movie of his life.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●●○○○○○○
Chalet Girl
It's getting far better notice's than it's trailer seems to warrent, but this British class-bashing romantic comedy, set in the European ski slopes might be a good bet for those wanting to waste a couple of hours. Felicity Jones and Ed Westwick are the forgettable leading couple, Bill's Bailey and Nighy among the faces you'll recognise.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
Cinar Agaci
The Turkish releases have been quiet lately (it always surprises me that the industry is so prolific over there) so it's good to see this familial drama, focusing on the relationship between a young boy, his single mother and his widowed grandmother getting a release.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●●○○○○○○○
Anuvahood
Uncertain of tone and audience this is a gritty spoof of life on the mean streets of London. Co-directed by and starring Adam Deacon, one of the cast in the far-superior Kidulthood, who frankly should know better.
Runs like a Gay Excitometer: ●●○○○○○○○○
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